Afraid to feel

I meant to post this two days ago.

But I didn’t forget… I froze.

It’s easy to think numbing looks like pouring a glass of wine or zoning out with Netflix. But numbing can also look like over - prepping, overthinking, and over-editing. The things we tell ourselves are “productive” can actually be how we avoid the feelings we don’t know how to face.

I almost didn’t post this at all. Because I’m building something sacred—something that feels so close to my skin - that I’d rather get it right than just get it done.

But that’s how we stay invisible.

That’s how our healing stays hidden.

That’s how we keep showing up “fine” while secretly feeling fried.

Numbing Isn’t Just Wine and Netflix

When we talk about numbing, we often picture obvious behaviors: over-drinking, binge-watching, scrolling for hours. But numbing can wear a disguise that looks a lot like over-functioning.

• Over-preparing

• Over-editing

• Over-performing

• Filling every margin with productivity

We don’t avoid our feelings because we’re weak. We avoid them because no one taught us how to survive them.

Why We’re Afraid to Feel

There’s a reason so many high-functioning women live in emotional freeze. It’s not because we’re broken—it’s because our nervous system got stuck in survival mode.

The freeze response is a real, biological reaction. It’s the body’s way of protecting us when fight or flight doesn’t feel possible. And sometimes, we stay in that freeze long after the moment of danger has passed.

We numb, not because we’re lazy or avoidant, but because our bodies are craving safety.

“You’re not broken. You’re just unpracticed at feeling.”

I Could Plan Everything… Except My Own Breakdown

I could plan a soccer tournament, juggle my parents’ doctor’s appointments, manage a full-time career…

But I couldn’t plan to fall apart.

So I didn’t.

Instead, I froze. And I got really good at functioning from that frozen place.

I could put together a flawless schedule, hit every deadline, and meet everyone’s needs—except my own.

Because feeling felt unsafe. Feeling felt like falling apart. And I wasn’t ready for that.

You Don’t Need a Breakdown—You Need a Safe Place to Feel

If you’ve been doing the work, reading the books, attending the webinars… and you still feel disconnected from yourself—this is for you.

You don’t need a breakdown. You don’t need another hustle-hard healing plan.

You need a soft, sacred place to unfreeze.

That’s what this chapter of my blog series is all about. It’s not a self-help pep talk. It’s a nervous system love letter.

If this post felt like it could’ve been written about you…

You can access my $1 voice memo series From Invisible to I AM™—a gentle invitation to feel again.

You don’t have to hold it all together. And you’re not alone.

I’m building this space brick by brave brick.

🕊️ With love, Elizabeth